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Get ready for a hilarious rollercoaster ride through the wild world of parenting on St. Patrick's Day! From green diaper disasters to leprechaun-led chaos, we've got all the funny tales and misadventures that will make you laugh til you're green in the face. So grab a cup of your favorite Irish drink & get ready for some shamrock shenanigans that will have you saying, "Who needs a pot of gold when you've got kids?"
#1
2 of my kids' birthdays are in late December so I'm basically not allowed to drink on St. Patrick's Day anymore.
— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) December 26, 2016
#2
6-year-old: The leprechaun didn't come last night.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 17, 2022
Me: He probably forgot.
6: How can he forget St. Patrick's Day?
Me: Too much Guinness.
#3
I love St. Patrick’s Day. Three drops of green food coloring in the pancake batter and I’m dad of the year
— The Dad (@thedad) March 17, 2022
#4
One St. Patrick’s Day a kid in my 3rd grader’s class told everyone the leprechaun brought him a Nintendo Switch and I hate his parents so much.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 17, 2024
#5
*cracks beer*
— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) March 17, 2018
7yo: Already?
Me: It's noon.
7yo: That's still early.
Me: It's St. Patrick's Day!
7yo: So?
Me: I'm half-Irish!
7yo: Are you full-alcoholic?
Me:
7yo:
Me: Go to your room.
#6
Everybody has different St. Patrick’s Day traditions. Some cook a traditional Irish meal, others go to a parade, and for my family it’s my daughter yelling at 6:30 AM that she has nothing green to wear.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) March 17, 2022
#7
Telling my kids they have to eat all their broccoli or get pinched cause it’s St. Patrick’s Day.
— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) March 17, 2024
#8
Found out that for my daughter’s seven years on this planet she thought we celebrate this guy on St. Patrick’s Day pic.twitter.com/UmK4yNtoW0
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) March 17, 2023
#9
One St. Patrick's Day my son's preschool gave them green milk and green cupcakes with green icing and the sheer panic that they caused with all the parents and the local pediatricians when they forgot to tell us
— nice things I say to myself (@meantomyself) March 17, 2024
#10
Some people use St. Patrick's Day as an excuse to drink, while the rest of us have kids for that.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) March 17, 2024
#11
It’s cute that my kids ask what we are doing for St. Patrick’s Day as if it’s not the exact same answer every year…
— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) March 5, 2024
You’ll be silly and wear green…while mommy & daddy come home silly and puke green. Remember?
#12
My 7yo just referred to Leprechauns as “St. Patrick’s Day Elfs” and I feel like he’s onto something here.
— Goldfish and Chicken Nuggets (@gfishandnuggets) March 18, 2023
#13
Since today is St. Patrick’s Day, I established dominance over my kids at breakfast by pouring them Lucky Charms cereal and eating the marshmallows.
— My Life As Dad (@milifeasdad) March 17, 2023
#14
I don't know who needs to hear this, but it's St. Patrick's Day and your kid needs 30 green shamrock cookies for their class party today.
— KJ (@IDontSpeakWhine) March 17, 2023
#15
My 5yo asked if he was allowed to get tattoos at daycare for St Patrick’s Day and I said yes because he assured me that his tattoos won’t be “drilled in” like the ones mommy has
— Kevin The Dad (@kevinthedad) March 14, 2023
#16
So what if I have three kids?
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 17, 2015
I'm still going to party hard on St. Patrick's Day.
*drinks milk and watches "Finding Nemo"*
#17
“How are you celebrating St. Patrick’s Day?” I have kids, like a Thursday.
— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) March 13, 2022
#18
My kid came home from school and asked if the leprechaun had visited and made any mischief, so I just pointed out all his toys that were already on the floor
— meghan (@deloisivete) March 17, 2023
#19
"Mom, why'd you make us a St Patrick's Day penis?"
— Danielle Herzog (@danicounselor) March 17, 2016
Screw you Pinterest. #StPatricksDay pic.twitter.com/C9uYk1HNzN
#20
I never did the whole leprechaun messing up the house tradition because, in order for my kids to notice there was a mess, I would have first needed to clean the existing mess.
— the Mom TruthBomb (@momTruthBomb) March 17, 2023
#21
Shout out to all the other parents whose kids didn’t get leprechaun treats because you’re already Santa, the Easter Bunny, the tooth fairy, the Valentine’s Day fairy, the Halloween party planner, the birthday magician, and OMG ENOUGH ALREADY
— The 21st Century SAHM (@21stcenturysahm) March 18, 2022
