Me: What kind of sandwich do you want?

9-year-old: Ice cream.

Me: Try again.

9: I got it right the first time.

— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) September 18, 2019

Me: Do that thing I like.

My husband: *Gives me an ice cream sandwich, hands me the remote, and leaves me alone for a few hours*

— Arianna Bradford (@thearibradford) January 4, 2020

So I’ve started this new thing where every morning I like to leisurely enjoy breakfast in bed, and by breakfast I mean an ice cream sandwich. I highly recommend starting your day this way.

— Kate Chastain (@Kate_Chastain) June 6, 2020

God grant me the audacity of my 5 year old walking out of the kitchen eating an ice cream sandwich and then asking me if she can have it.

— Marissa 💚💛 (@michimama75) February 17, 2022

*overheard from the other room

8yo: Can I have an ice cream sandwich?

Grandma: Did you finish your dinner?

8yo: No

Grandma: Just one then

— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) December 17, 2017

My son got upset that there was ice cream in his ICE CREAM SANDWICH.

When does the “light of my life” part start?

— Dad and Buried (@DadandBuried) May 5, 2018

I’m working from home and I’m up to my eyeballs in a nasty divorce trial prep.

My kid just walked in and handed me an ice cream sandwich and said, “This will take the edge off” and walked out of the room.

Is he a Rockstar? Superstar? My own personal Jesus? I haven’t decided yet

— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) July 9, 2019

My fitness app congratulated me on reaching my daily activity goal, as I walked to the kitchen to get an ice cream sandwich.

— Sa🐝rina ✨ (@adorableinNE) September 15, 2022

Movie Night! Tonight it’s Fast and Furious, but it’s just me racing to the fridge to sneak a second ice cream sandwich before my wife gets back from the bathroom.

— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) September 17, 2022

*At Subway*
Me: You can have any sandwich you want
9yo: Ok, I want an ice cream sandwich
Me: Dang, you're good.

— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) June 4, 2019

Just here living my best life, eating an ice cream sandwich and screaming into the void

— Lottie-pop 🍭 (@Lottie_Poppie) May 19, 2022

Having an ice cream sandwich for dinner isn’t a great idea because that’s just not enough protein so I went ahead and had 5 just to be safe.

— ✨WendyDarling✨ (@wendchymes) July 22, 2019

I had pizza, french fries, and an ice cream sandwich for dinner. No silverware needed. I win.

— Stacey (@skittle624) July 27, 2019

I'm on my 4th ice cream sandwich today. Not sure if my life is coming together or falling apart

— Barroom Hero 🦬 (@UnIxphysco) May 20, 2020

Today my kid said, "Mom can I have a sandwich, I can get it myself."
I was like, "Sure thing! You are getting so big!"
I walked in the kitchen a couple minutes later and there he was, eating an ice cream sandwich and he looked right at me and said, "What? It's a sandwich!"

— Scary Mommy (@ScaryMommy) June 16, 2021

I told my daughter we didn’t have ice cream so I could have the last ice cream sandwich.

I’m going to hell aren’t I?

— Princess Consuela Banana Hammock (@iluvtacos0822) April 25, 2022